How to Get Over Being Cheated On?

Having gone through this myself, I know for a fact that this traumatic experience can become one of your biggest life lesson as long as you allow it to. Here are some steps to turn this around and really get over it.

Let’s start with level 1: Be angry at everything but yourself.
YES, being cheated on is not a good situation—your ego, your self-esteem, and your body are probably all on fight mode trying to protect you at all costs. Allow yourself to be angry. Go have a good cry, go party with your friends, complain and release. Go throw everything that reminds you of this situation out. Just do not hate on yourself. That is key. Recognize that this situation does not diminish your worth. Don’t blame yourself for this happening. It was meant for a bigger reason.

Level 2: Allow yourself to release the hate
See that this situation is now over. You are in control of your life. You can decide to no longer take it to heart. You can choose to let it go. Holding onto the past or anger or any negativity is very unhealthy for our minds and body. We can also physically get ill.

Try to release the hate by rationalising that it is currently not happening to you right now. The negative situation is over.

Level 3: Reflect, what can you learn from this?
There is a reason for everything. If you can see this situation from another point of view, what can you learn? Self-love? Self-respect? That you deserve better? Take the time to reflect on that. There are so many lessons to learn when something hits you so hard. I personally learned that I was graceful and there was no hate in me from the way I reacted. I learned that I was respectful to the people involved and tried my best to understand their points of view. I learned that I deserve better and that if I love myself unconditionally, my partner will too. The list is endless. It really propelled me to a whole new level of self-love.

Level 4: Congratulations—you’re stronger than ever.
Be thankful for the learning journey that you have bestowed upon yourself. You picked yourself up when no one picked you. You have chosen to take care of yourself and release the hate and anger. You’re on a different level now—You are able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

If you’re ever feeling down about being cheated on, find a friend to talk to, journal it all out, find an outlet.

I’m here for you if you ever need to talk to a nice stranger.

With love,
Chara

This was originally posted on Lemon8.